We Are Their Covering

I was sitting at the kitchen table having a conversation with my mother after everyone left last nite about different things. One particular thing was my dad's side of the family. They live their lives very different than we do. I haven't seen most of them in several years and the ones I have seen I only see when there is a funeral. Its very dysfunctional the way they live their lives and they all need god. They claim to be going to church and try to talk the talk but they don't walk the walk. They all seem to have trouble letting go of the things of this world and have a distorted view of things. Many of them have been locked up numerous times and a few still are. They have all done drugs and alcohol of varying kinds and degrees. To them we are the black sheep of the family because we live our lives differently than they do. My parents even before they became saved made a decision to keep all of that stuff away from us. We never really saw my cousins and aunts and uncles growing up much. There are things about my family that I have learned this year that I never knew before and it stunned me. I was telling my mom how different mine and my sisters life might have turned out if they allowed us to be around all of that stuff. God knew what his plans were for my sis and I and he had us going a different path. Now both of us are involved in ministry of different kinds, she is a children's pastor at her church and I am in the dance ministry. Its sad that they all know the truth and know that they need Jesus, but they chose not to turn their lives over to him. They have let the things of this world get such a hold on them that they feel like they cant turn back now. My dads family needs all your prayers and I am believing that they will come to know him. I thank god that I was blessed with such loving parents and that even before they knew him they chose to do what was right for us. I think back to my life and having my children. I had to make such a choice to keep them away from their father and the things that he was doing. It wasn't an easy choice but I knew it was the right one. We are the covering for our children til they are old enough to make the choice for themselves as to whether they will follow him or not. I am thankful that my parents were my covering. That is a heavy responsibility that we all have as parents. I haven't always made the best choices in my life, but when it comes to my children I try to do what I know god would have me do. They are only given to us temporarily to help raise them to be men and women of god. Then he will take over and show them his will for their lives. I don't take the responsibility lightly and love my children with all my heart and want to see them grow up to be women of god. They are both involved in ministry themselves now and they love god with all their heart.

Let Him Be Your Exit Sign

Last week one of my co workers needed to use the restroom but I was in there and he could not wait til I was finished so he went next door to another warehouse to use theirs. It was 5 clock already and they usually go home then. They told him yes you can use the restroom so he went in there unaware that while he was in there they turned out all the lights and locked the doors and left. They had forgotten that he had went in the restroom. When he came out all the doors were locked and he couldn't get out. The dock doors had pad locks on them and he couldn't get out the front door cuz of the way it was locked. He was alone in the dark and everywhere he looked there was no way out. He was like how am I going to get out of here. It took him a few minutes to gather himself so that he wouldn't panic. Then he looked and saw a lighted exit sign over a door to the side. That door was able to be unlocked and he got out. The reason I am telling you this story is not to make anyone laugh it is because in that moment god was able to show me something. Many of us either were like him or still are at one time. We chose to do something without thinking of the consequences of it. Then when we find ourselves in the dark wandering around and no way out of a situation and we wonder how we are going to get out of it. We try to do things ourselves our way giving no thought to what it is god wants us to do. Then when we try to get out of a situation its as if the doors are all locked on us. We panic and get upset and become frantic in our thoughts and behavior trying to figure it all out. When what we should have done is follow what it is god wanted for us to do in the first place. In all that you do god should be first. He is the one you need to go to when you need answers, healing, a breakthrough. Not everyone else or trying to do it on your own. Let him be the one to guide you through. If you do find yourself in a situation where you didn't listen to him then ask him to be your exit sign and show you the way. Sometimes is wont be as easy as unlocking a door and walking through. You may have to deal with the consequences of your choices but he will be there with you every step of the way.

He Restored It Brighter Than Ever!!!!!!!!

Sitting here at my desk listening to one of the song we will be doing for christmas. This sing has gotten down into my spirit and I cry everytime I hear it. Its one of those songs that when you hear it and let it get down in your spirit you begin to feel how much god really loved us to give us his son. He has put this fire back in me that I had let go dim for a while. Sometimes you let your circumstances get in the way of letting that fire burn as bright as it should. I want to let it burn bright and not let anything or anyone put it out or dim it. I am humbled and priveleged to be chosen to do this for him. Its not about your talent its about your heart for him. If you give all you have to him he will use you in ways you would have never believed he would do.

Barely Hanging On

Have you ever found yourself barely hanging on like this grasshopper on the glass door. Feeling yourself slipping down the glass but your trying desperately to hold on and the wind is blowing and the elements around you are getting worse. You feel as if your going to fall and no one is there to catch you. No matter what it is that you go through in life there is a purpose for it. The purpose isn't always clear to us while we are going through it because all we see is our circumstance. We have all heard many times said that god doesn't put any more on us than we can handle. Sometimes it feels like we cannot handle another feather to land on us or we will fall under the pressure of it all. God is always there with us through it all and he knows whats waiting on the other side of the storm your in. This is my favorite verses in the bible and I remind myself of them each and every day. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4. So when you find yourself barely hanging on like the grasshopper just remember that god is always there with you no matter what storm your weathering.

Its What I Needed To Hear

You know today at church was awesome and I loved every moment of it. It wasnt until church was over with that I truly got what god meant for me today. I was standing with two friends who were talking about something that I cannot really relate to cuz I have never been through it. Something was said in that conversation that god pulled at my heart and said thats what I have been trying to tell you all along. I have so much love and respect for these two ladies and I want them to know that because of what you went through even if it was for nothing else it was for god to tell me what he needed me to hear in that moment. I did not experience the things you did and cannot relate but what was said in that moment was what I needed to hear. I love you and you will never know how much that meant to me today. I definitely push things down deep like Im using my last trash bag.