Change....Do We Really Want It?

With the year being almost over alot people sit and reflect what they want to change about themselves. In reality most people never really change anything about themselves when a new year begins. Some people say they want to lose weight and they half heartedly go into it and begin trying to exercise and eat right, but their drive to want to lose the weight fizzles out. They may start off strong and doing all the right things, but they find it difficult and uncomfortable to do. That's just an example of what many of us do because when it comes to bring about change in our lives we say we want it, but do we really? If most of us would be honest with ourselves and others we would admit that we do not like change we like things to remain the same. Its more comfortable to remain the same than to put forth the effort to bring about real change in our lives. We do the same thing in our relationship with Christ. We say we want a deeper more intimate walk with him and we start off trying to do that, but then the desire fizzles out of us. We start to pray more, read more, fast, and try to listen to what it is he wants from us, but then we get lazy and caught up in what we want to do and lose the desire to want it anymore. We get in a place of comfort and laziness. I have been guilty of this many times in my life and I'm not very proud of it, but I recognize it and ask God every day to help me not let my desire for you fizzle out. I want his help in keeping that desire burn for him, because I know that I cannot do it on my own. We should ask this daily of him and not just because a new year is getting ready to begin. Take a good look inside yourself and see what it is that is holding you back from a deeper place in him and ask him to help you keep that desire going for him in your life. Its not an easy thing to die to our selfish nature and I wish I could say it gets easier, but I do know one thing God will never stop helping you keep that desire burning inside you if you truly want it. We have to push self out of the way and let him take over.

Giving Is What Its All About

I have had the privilege for the last year to go to a church that knows how to give back to those who are in need. Its not just at Christmas time when they do it they give all year long. We partner with a ministry called River City Love Squad which feeds, clothes, and ministers to those who are homeless or they don't have much and need a little help. I was so blessed to have such a small part in helping this year for their Christmas dinner that was held at our church this year. They bused in lots of homeless and families that were in need. We all pitched in and helped prepare food for them, organize blankets, clothes, lunch bags, Christmas gifts for them. I was so moved by seeing how many people are in such need. God gave me a dream that I was to bring specific items with me that night to the dinner. I had this dream several nights in a row prior to that night. I was to bring a brand new coat that I had bought for myself, my favorite blue scarf, a blue necklace that a very good friend of mine gave me, and my bible which has a blue cover on it. I asked God why would he want me to give my bible away to someone. He said are you willing to give up everything for me and to help someone who doesn't know me and is in need. I said yes I am. When the day arrived I wasn't sure who I was to give it to or anything, but I knew God would show me when the time was right. There was little lady I saw being prayed for up at the front at the end of the service and God tugged on my heart and said that is her. I went up and found her and her name was Toni. Her husband had left her and she lost everything and was homeless. She only had the clothes on her back she came in with. I introduced myself to her and shared with her the dream God had given me. She cried and hugged me tight and said God sent you to me your my angel. I couldn't hold back the tears and just stood there and held her for a long time. I gave her the coat, the blue scarf, and blue necklace and she said God knew that blue was my favorite color. She put it on and said I will never forget you and she prayed for me that God would bless me as he had done for her. She was grateful for what he had blessed her with and wanted to share what she had just been blessed with as well. I couldn't hold back the tears for the rest of the night. Whether you believe in God or not I am sure you believe in helping others. I work for a great company and for those of you who are reading this if you take anything away from this I hope it is to look around you and see who it is in need and do what you can to help. We are all just a thread away from being homeless ourselves, but we don't think about it that way. We are a blessed country, but we complain when we have to sit in traffic, we complain because our food is too cold when we order it, we complain because we have to stand in line at walmart too long. Think of it this way. You are blessed to even have a car to drive to get to where you need to go. You are blessed to have the money to go to a restaurant and eat. You are blessed that you can go to walmart and get things that you need or just want. I have been humbled working with my church this past year with the River City Love Squad and seeing how my life could have been if I was in there place. Merry Christmas to everyone and God Bless you all.

Stop The Excuse Game!!!!!

Its time that Christians stop using excuses as to why they don't spend time with God in that secret place every day, why they don't tell others about Jesus and how he died to save them from going to hell, why they aren't doing more than they are now. Christians play the excuse game quite often and I was and am guilty of it as well. We get so caught up in me..me...me...me...oh poor is me that we forget our purpose. God brought us out of the messes we were in and brought us life..a new life of peace, grace, and hope. Why would you not want to tell everyone you know about that?

CRAZY LOVE!!!!

I am getting ready to start listening to the book "Crazy Love" on cd. When you think of Jesus and all he has done for us doesn't that make you just fall more and more in love with him? If it doesn't then you need to stop and take a minute and just think of where your life was at before you let him into your life. I know if it were not for his love for me I would be in any number of situations in my life now. If you don't know him and haven't accepted him into your life then take a moment and just say a simple prayer and ask him to come into your life and to help you clean up all the junk on the inside of you. It doesn't take this big long prayer with alot of words its just simply saying Jesus come into my life and save me. You would be amazed at the people in just the United States alone that do not know about Jesus and have a personal relationship with him. We always think about people in other countries that haven't heard the gospel, but we take for granted that people here know of him. The truth is there are many people who don't and we pass by them every day and never tell them how he died to save us all. Make it your priority to show others of the Crazy Love that you have for him and that he has for us.

Something Extraordinary On The Inside

Well I can definitely say that God has been doing something extraordinary in me because I have been so emotional now for the few months or so. I can feel him tugging at me all the time and leading me to do things out of the ordinary for me. I have come to the point now where I don't care where I am at if he asks me to do something for someone, say something to someone, or just to fall on my face in the middle of a crowd I will do it. When you are at the point like that you know that you really don't care what the world thinks of you and that all you care about is what God has and is doing in your life and you want to share with others about how much he loves them. Don't let anything keep you from sharing his love to others. You carry the light of his glory in you and it needs to shine bright and continuously so that the people who are in darkness can find their way to him. Don't let yourself get full of junk on the inside cuz it takes root and it hardens your heart and keeps you from what it is God has for you to do.

Nuggets That God Drops In You

Dont you just love how God gives you nuggets of things and we take those nuggets and eat it all up not realizing while he is dropping these into you how it all comes together. Here are some of mine that I have posted on my facebook over the course of week or two. He never ceases to amaze me.


I have been doing alot of thinking lately and observing inside myself as well as others. Why is it that we say we want more of God and what he wants for our lives, but yet we don't give it all to him? What is it you are searching for? Why do you look everywhere but still don't find it? You cant fill the void with with anything except God. Hes the only one who gives you what you need and guides you to it. Rely on him, Serve him, let your desires be his and he will fill you with his glory. No earthly treasure, No person, No hobby, etc... can take the place of him. When we truly get that and stop playing games and give it ALL to him holding back nothing then we will be truly full and blessed. God doesn't want your sacrifice he wants your obedience. Look to him for guidance and wisdom not in places where there is only darkness and chaos. Give him your all...truly give him all and he will take you beyond what you ever thought possible in him. Woke up today with an expectancy in my spirit this morning. God is stirring that fire that he has placed in me and he saw that it was trying to go out, but he has added more fuel for it to burn bright. Don't let anything or anyone sway you to put that fire out. The choices we make no matter how insignificant it seems at the moment can affect the fire he has placed in you. Every decision you make can either help that fire burn bright for him or it can be put out. Ask him for wisdom in all your choices and decisions. Stop relying on your own understanding because we don't always see what it is God is doing or taking us and he ALWAYS knows best. I can remember sitting down and writing and just thinking how the name JESUS sounded to me and made me feel. He has brought me back to that time in my life to show me No matter how your day is, what circumstance your in, how sick you are, etc... that if we call on the name of JESUS he will see is thru it and never leave us. "There is a name that's above all names on this earth...his name is JESUS JESUS..a sweet name, a soft name that soothes the ears." My sis and I sang this years ago when we were both young and I can remember standing up on the platform with her and how nervous I was, but when I began to sing those words he had given me I felt an overwhelming sense of peace and love from him.

Being Single....And Being Okay With It

I have been rather quiet on my blog lately and I guess that is due to the fact that I got lazy and didn't feel I had anything to write down. I have been taking in as much as I can lately from God and just letting him show me where I need to get things in order in my life. Sometimes we tend to let things side track us without realizing that it's happening until it's too late. I have been single now for a long time and there are times that I long to have someone in my life that I can share it with, but I seem to find the wrong ones. I am really OK being single if that is what God wishes for my life, because I only what more of him. He has had to teach me to be satisfied in my situation. I can't say that its always easy and I have my moments when it bothers me, but I have to say for the most part I am just fine with it. I was having a discussion with a good friend of mine recently and I told her that I know what it is I want in a relationship now after many years of having what I didn't want. God knows what I need and when he sees fit to bring that person into my life then I will welcome it with open arms. I will know when it is right, because there will be no confusion about it and no wondering if this is the right one. I have learned that. God has brought me to a place in my life where he wants it to be all about him and no distractions from anything. I have had many people removed from my life and many things have changed over the last 4 years. For those of you that are single like me and find yourself desiring to have someone in your life to share it with stop and ask God what it is he wants for your life. He knows your desires already and when its right he will bring some of them to pass, but ask him what it is his desires are and ask him to make his desires your desires and you will find that not only will the loneliness go away but he will fill you so full of him that you will be able to contain it anymore. Don't get your eyes on the wrong thing and don't let yourself get into situation that may lead to something that it shouldn't. Keep your mind renewed, heart open, and guard your spirit because the enemy will tempt you when you are at your weakest. Stay in that secret place with God and let him speak to you and fill you up so that you can go out and carry his glory to the world. Let him set you apart from everything so that he can shine through you.

Stronger And Stronger It Grows

Monday I had written on my facebook page that I was taking a break from facebook and being on the Internet other than to write on my blog. I have had this fire ignite in me and I have been praying to God to not let me grow cold and let the flame go out. I have hungered for him more than ever and the hunger grows stronger and stronger everyday. He told me in order for me to keep that burning I had to get things in order. I was like OK God whatever you need me to do. It may sound funny to you all, but the first thing he told me to do is to get my apartment in order and cleaned up and cleaned out. I was like OK what does this have to do with anything God. He says just do what I ask. So I have begun to get my apartment in order. I am not all the way finished but by this weekend I will have it done. My apartment has been such a mess for a while now that it has distracted me from wanting to spend time with God. Then on Monday he told me to stay off of the Internet for a while. The only thing I can do is write on my blog and post it on my facebook then that's it. I was like OK I can do that no problem. Well I didn't realize how much I had used my facebook on my mobile until I wasn't able to do it this week. I was on it on and off all day long. It was distracting me when I would get home from work or at my lunch and breaks that I could have been spending time with God. Then Tuesday nite I had an extremely long day at work. I worked 12 hrs with no lunch because it was the end of the month. I was exhausted and my body was hurting badly. I had went home ate a little bit and then went to bed. I remember thinking to myself I just want more of you as I went to sleep. I had a dream on repeat all nite long. Have you all ever had that happen? I did and it was a dream of me dancing to the song "Show Me Your Glory" by Lakewood Church. I absolutely love that song. I had that dream all nite along until I opened my eyes on Wednesday morning. That song has been in my spirit for a while but now it has a whole new meaning for me. God has begun to show me that In order for him to show us his glory we have to be willing to push all the distractions away, give up some things, clean up some things, and to watch what we put into our spirits by the way of television and music. Its one thing to pray and tell God you want more of him, but its another to do it. We often make excuses as to why we cant spend more time with him. Its because I was too tired from working 12 hrs, I had too much to do at home, I had to go here and take the kids there, there is nothing wrong with watching this it doesn't have anything really bad in it, I like this song why cant I listen to it..it doesn't talk about anything sexual or anything. What you put into your spirit man affects your thoughts and actions to things more than you know. We need to stop and take a few minutes and say OK God let me make you my number one priority and put only the things into me that you want me to have, let me do the things that you want me to do. I am not saying that you cant do things or watch things but watch what you put into yourself. I choose to keep something out of my spirit and only want him to fill me with more of him. I want him to show me his glory in a way that I have never experienced before. I want to be in that intimate moment with him when no one else is there, but him and I. I want to be able to reach out and touch him and have him wrap me in him. That's why I love this song because its exactly how I feel right now. I want him to show me his glory. Here is that song and I want you to listen to it and listen to the words. I'm sure most of you have heard it before, but listen to it with new ears and let it get into your spirit. My prayer is that he will show his glory to you like never before.

Take Out The Trash

My pastor has some of the most unique analogies I have ever heard and they stick with you too. He was talking about have anyone ever tried to throw away an old garbage can. You sit it out there with the rest of your garbage and its split down the middle and torn. The garbage men come to pick up the trash and they take everything but that torn up garbage can. Then the next day you sit it out there again and they leave it yet again. Day after day you could sit that trash can out there and the garbage men wont pick it up. Why? Thats what garbage is supposed to go into so they wont pick it up. You literally have to tear the garbage can to pieces and put it in a trash bag in order for them to take it. Isnt that how it is with us as chritians. We keep playing on the edge of sin day after day and then come to church on sundays like that garabage can that never got picked up. You cant let the sins of your past or present to keep coming back. You have to let God scrape, tear, and demolish all that sin thats in your heart so that it can be taken away like the trash can that was broken.

My Prayer For My Journey Ahead

Keep the flame ignited in me God. Don't let me be foolish enough to let it burn out. Guide me with your hand and give me the strength and the wisdom for the journey ahead. Though the road maybe rough at times I know that you are there with me pushing the obstacles out of my way. God I want lay in your arms and breath in everything you have for me. I want to be in that secret place surrounded by your glory. Take me to places I've never been soaring higher and higher. I want to be where you want me to be and do as you want me to do. God I surrender my mind, heart, soul, my entire life to you to do have me do as you will. No looking back or looking side to side. My eyes are focused ahead to walk th path you have layed out. Though I may not know the destination I am heading to I have to trust that you have it all under control. You never promised it would be easy, but I know you will let me see the road clearly I am walking on once you remove the obstacles that I have allowed to hold me back. Yeah an AHH HAAA Moment isnt it :)

Sooo Hungry!!!!

Have you ever been so hungry you thought that your stomach was going to eat itself if you didn't get something to eat. That is how I have been hungering for God lately. I hunger for him so much that I crave him more than I ever have. He has ignited the flame inside me and its burning so much that I can feel the heat from it constantly. He doesn't want me to forget that burning he placed inside me so he is keeping it going in me. I was laying in the bed this morning at 5am wide awake and was just thinking how my life would be without him. It would be a chaotic mess and I would be just as lost as the rest of the world. This was my prayer yesterday as I was getting ready for bed.....

"God I want lay in you arms and breath in everything you have for me. I want to be in that secret place surrounded by your glory. Take me to places I've never been soaring higher and higher. I want to be where you want me to be and do as you want me to do."

The Mind A War Zone

Have you ever just had a bad week where it seemed nothing was coming together the way it should? Everything was going through your mind a thousand miles and hour and you start to worry and let fear take over. We battle our own mind more than any other thing that we face as Christians. Its more of a war zone than a real battle at times. We have to renew our minds constantly. We have to renew our minds not only daily, but sometimes moment by moment when we are in the midst of all the thoughts that over take our minds. Let God give you peace and rest in your mind. We have to remember that there are things that are out of our control and let him handle it. Having true faith... in God is knowing he has in all under control and letting him calm your fears. I wish i could say that fear goes away and never comes back. The enemy tries to keep us in that place of worry and fear in our mind. God didn't give us a spirit of fear. We have to stand against it and say my daddy has it all taken care of so I need not worry anymore. Its easy for someone to say don't let it bother you God has it all taken care of when they are not the ones going through it. You have to determine in your own mind, heart, and soul that you are not going to let the enemy torment you anymore. When we do that then God can take over and give you peace of mind. No matter how bad the thoughts get in your mind just take a moment to renew your mind and take rest and refuge in him. He is the only one whom we can take comfort in.

His Arms Are Wide Open

I was listening to some music today and I found this song and it made me think. People are looking for love and they search and search and search and when they think they find it...it leaves them emptier than they were before. Alot of people have their own idea of what they think love is or what it should look like. Listening to the words of this song has me look back into my own past and see what it is I thought love was. I made many mistakes in the past with the relationships I got myself into. I let men use me because of the sweet words they would try to say to me and make me feel like they loved me when they really didn't. They wanted what they could get from me and I was foolish enough to give it to them. Even as a born again christian I had my struggles in the past with giving myself freely to the person I was with. Yes I am talking about sex. As Christians we know it isn't right to have sex outside of marriage but our need to have someone love us back sometimes clouds our thinking when we are not in tune with God. When we keep him first in our lives and we let him show us the love he has for us and what he has done for us then nothing else seems to matter. It took me a long time even as a christian to get my thinking straight and to keep him first in everything. I struggled for years with it and was ashamed of myself for letting myself get into relationships with men and have sex when they wanted to with me. The pain ran deeper inside me than I would ever let anyone know, but God knew. He was waiting for me to say I give it all to you and let him come in and repair the hurt and to heal all the scars left behind. I am here today to say that he has healed my hurts of the past and now God is placing inside me more of him. I like how this song says: "If anybodys looking for love in all the wrong places
If youve been searching for love, come to Me. Come to me.
Take up your cross. Deny yourself.
Forget your fathers house and run. Run with Me.
Cause you were made for abandon your heart and listen
Cause you were made for Someone greater, Someone bigger, so follow Me.
And youll come alive when you learn to die.
And He said to me...You shall love me."

This song brought me to tears today, because I know how hard the road was for me and I see so many people out there who are on the same path I was and some even worse than me. It pains my heart to see people hurting and looking for love in all the wrong places. My prayer is that they find Jesus and let him love them just as they are and right where they are.

JUST BELIEVE

NO LIMITS!!! NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD. LET HIM TAKE U SO U CAN SOAR. YOUR TIME IS RIGHT NOW TO JUST RECEIVE IF U JUST BELIEVE THERE IS NO LIMITS. Alot of you say we believe that there are no limits to what God can do....but do you believe that? Let him speak to you and show you just what he has in store. The problem is you want to know everything now. So in your mind you have put limitations on God. Stand out on the beach at 5am in the morning as the sun is rising and look out at the ocean and see how you cannot see beyond the horizon. Just because you cant see beyond the horizon doesn't mean that there isn't more out there. So shake loose the limitations in your mind and GET READY FOR WHAT GOD HAS IN STORE.

A Heart For Worship

This is a dance I did for the workshop we hosted earlier this year. It was a wonderful weekend of different people from different churches coming together and soaking in what the lord had for them. I love the concert portion that we close out with for our workshops. It gives everyone a chance to sit back and watch and soak in what God has placed in other people. Its such a blessing to see the different groups. This song for me was a very emotional and powerful song. I had never heard the song until two weeks before we did the workshop. I had no idea what God wanted me to do with it he only said I want you to dance for me. I cried the whole time I was dancing and it was very emotional for me. It was if time had stood still and no one else was in the room and I was before him dancing and pouring my whole heart and soul out to him. I am sure that to most people that see me dance I am not one of the greatest dancers, but I have a heart for God and its not about ability its about obedience and giving everything you have to him and let him do the rest. I hope that you all enjoy it and get as much out of it as I did when I was dancing to it.

In Your Intimate Moments With God

Have you ever had a moment when you were listening to a worship song and just singing and it seemed that time stood still? In that intimate moment with God he wrapped his arms around you and you felt at peace. Worshiping is so much more than just singing a song, raising your hands, or dancing. When you spend time with him in those intimate moments he teaches you so much more about worship than your mind can fathom. Our lives should be spent in all we do worshiping him. Believe me I know its not so easy, but when we surrender and let him take over and just worship him you feel him filling you with his love, peace, and joy.

What Is It Consuming Your Time?

Here is a thought to ponder on. What is it that is consuming your time that you do not have time to spend with God? Our focus should be on him first and foremost. If he isn't the center of it all then what is it that is consuming your time. We need to get our priorities in order and stop letting other things keep us from hearing what it is God is trying to say to us.

Showing The Love Of God To The Needy

Monday evening I normally have dance practice, but this past Monday nite we went down to the River City Love Squad. They have a service every Monday nite that starts with music then ministering to the people. After that they serve a hot meal, give out clothing, blankets, etc... It was my privilege along with other people from my church to go down and help serve the food and give out clothing to people. These are not just homeless people, but people who need god in their lives. There were some strange characters there that nite looking at them on the outside, but when you talk to them you see how much they really need Jesus. Many of them struggle with drugs, alcohol, sexual demons of all kinds, and just the day to day struggles of life. Many of them don't see anything good all they see is violence, hurt, and hate. I commend the people that are down there every week that are down there to just serve these people in anyway they can and show them the love of Jesus. It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside, smell like, talk like, act like Jesus loves you just as you are and you need to lay it all down at his feet. Will it be easy for some of them to do that...no. They will struggle with it until they are free of it. Its not up to us to judge them its up to us to love them and help them in whatever way we can. I encourage all of you to find a place in your community or if your church is involved in helping a place like the River City Love squad to get involved and help out.

Who Is It You Rely On?

My weekend was supposed to be one spent at home getting things done this weekend and relaxing. I have to say it was anything but that. Friday after I left work I went to pick my kids up and we went to best buy and I bought a new tv and a new dvd player for my bedroom. Everything was normal about Friday nite til I turned out the light and went to bed. I saw over on the wall a long huge bug of some kind that looked like it had several legs and antennas on it and it was creepy looking. I killed it and went to sleep. Saturday morning I got up and cleaned a little bit and then met my sister at tumbleweed and enjoyed a nice lunch. In the middle of a noisy restaurant it is hard to hear my youngest daughter because she doesn't speak very loud most of the time. Well in the middle of us eating all you heard was this loud burp coming from this skinny quiet girl and she laughed so hard she couldn't eat...she gets that from her mammaw. After that we went to Kroger so Natalie could buy some tickets to WWE wrestling for her, my nephews, and my brother in law to go in July. Then it was off to my sisters church to finish some more of the VBS stuff. Well I had to redraw two of the characters because they were beyond me fixing and my sister is very particular how she does things for VBS. She says go big or don't go and do it with excellence. I happen to agree with her on that as well. We were up there til later than I had expected to and when I got home I layed in the bed watching tv and fell asleep. Sunday morning I woke up to Natalie saying mom are we going to church this morning? I said yes what time is it she said 10:20am. I was like are you kidding me why didn't you wake me up when you got up. The night before I had forgotten to set my alarm and missed church yesterday morning. I do not like missing church. Well since we missed church we decided to go check out a new store up in St. Matthews my mother told us about and we bought a few things and we were headed home on the watterson expressway. Everything was fine til after we passed the wesport road exit. I heard a loud POP and then thump thump thump thump thump thump....my tire had blown and I was in the middle lane of the expressway and pulled off to the side on the off ramp to Breckenridge lane. Well I thought this is not biggie I have changed a tire before. So I jacked the car up took all the lug nuts off and started to pull the tire off when all of a sudden the jack fell down. So I had Natalie help me jack it up again and we tried to pull it off again and it fell again. We did this 3 times until I finally said OK I need to call for some help. Luckily my brother in law was at my parents house not too far from where we were at. I told him where I was and which way to go to get there but he took a different way which caused us to wait 25 minutes til he turned and went the way i told him. While we were waiting I had the air on in the car and the kids were in the back seat keeping cool and i was in the front and all of a sudden i hear Natalie say to Olivia...."Hold still and don't move". Then all you hear is SMACK across Olivia's head and she said ouch what did you do that for. It was a big spider crawling on her head. Natalie was like well if i had told you what i was doing you would have moved then the spider would have crawled on all of us and we couldn't have killed it. Well they finally get to us and we get the spare on and we first go to pepboys to see about getting tires but it was going to be over an hour before they could even look at it. My dad said just come to my house and I will put a tire from my Taurus on to yours til you can get tires tomorrow. So we went there and spend several hours with my family before coming home last nite. Then I get up this morning and my dad calls me and says meet me up at Sam's Club and we will get some tires put on the car. We were there for maybe an hour and then I went to target and came home. Yes it sounds like a typical weekend for most people when unexpected things happen, but god shows me things thru some of the oddest situations. Just like we have our mind set that things we want to do have to be certain way and its not always what god wants us to do. Just like I had in mind what I thought my weekend was going to be like and it changed on me. Just like that bug crawling on my wall. Most people wouldn't have noticed it on the wall in the dark and would have went to sleep. God wants us to be watchful for the enemy trying to creep up on us not to be sleeping. Just like my daughter burping loud in the middle of a restaurant and laughing so hard she couldn't contain it. That's how god wants us to be joyful to the point that we cannot contain ourselves so that people stop to look and say what is it about them that makes them glow with such joy. He wants people to see the joy in us. Just like I had to redraw the two characters for VBS sometimes god has to help us thru our mistakes that we make and to learn from it. Sometimes that means we have to go back and redo some things to make it right. Then there are the times that unexpected things occur that we have not control over. Just like when my tire blew and I tried to fix it myself we try to do things ourselves without asking god for help. We need to know when to let god step in and take over instead of trying to do things ourselves because there are things that only our father can take care of it just like i had to call my dad for help. We sometimes try to take a different route than what is telling us to go and we get off the path and find ourselves lost. Just like when my brother in law took a different way to get to where i was at. We need to learn to listen to the instructions we are given and not try to think we know best. That prideful spirit is what gets us into trouble thinking that we know more than he does. Just like when Natalie hit her sister in the side of the head to kill the spider and didn't tell her why to sit still is just like when god is telling us to wait without telling us what we are waiting for. We have times in our lives where god doesn't always tell us what hes doing and why because we would just mess things up by doing it our way instead of his. In the end of it all I asked my daddy for help and he was there for me steering me in the right direction. That is how it should be with us and god. We should always go to him for help and quit letting pride get in the way because we think we can handle something on our own. God knows whats best for us and he has a plan and purpose for us all. Don't let your sinful selfish pride get in the way of the destiny god has for your life. He has great things in store for you and it may not always be easy along the way, but as long as we rely on him and ask him for wisdom, patience, and understanding we will endure through it all.

Push Through Anyway!!!!

You know god shows us things through some of the oddest and worse times that we have. I have been sick with a sinus infection for a week and a half now. The first day of being sick I had a high fever and body aches that were so bad it made me dizzy and I wasn't able to stand up on my feet. It was a struggle to get up and go to the bathroom. I made myself get up anyway. I barely ate or drank that day and could not sleep nor could I breath very well. That night sleeping was impossible and I was very tired. The next day I had to go back to work once my fever had broke. I pushed myself to get up out of bed and to go to work and every day at work has been exhausting trying to get over this, but I knew I had to come to work. Everyday I push myself to work and get everything done that I can. Then when I feel like I cant do anymore I push myself even more and say you can do this. Why is it when it comes to living for God and doing things for god we just say I cant do it or get lazy? We always want to find an excuse as to why we cant do something for God or when we are going through something we want to give up. Just like I had to push myself through the sickness to work my job so that I can take care of my girls I should do no less when it comes to the things of God. I should give no less effort. Sure it can get hard sometimes and you have the enemy attacking you at every side, but that is when we have to press in and push through anyway. Jesus took all those beatings, was mocked and ridiculed, and hung on a cross and died for us. Why is it that we find it difficult to live for him, tell others about him, or even find it difficult to give up the things of this world for him? If he can endure that for us then we should do no less for him. When it seems as if you have no strength and you just cant give it anymore push through anyway. Your strength comes from him and push through anyway even when you don't feel like it. You will find that he has given you more strength than you realize that you have. Don't give up on him because he hasn't given up on you. He has equipped us with everything that we need and all we have to do is trust him and push through anyway. So when you find yourself wanting to give up, let temptation get the best of you, sickness coming upon you, the enemy hitting you from every side, or whatever it may be you are going through at that moment just stop and say God I know you have given me the strength to get through this help me to push through.

Is Satan Whispering In Your Ear?

I am in awe and humbled by the things that god is showing me. He is preparing me for something I cannot even fathom. God does not have us do something without him equipping us and preparing us in some way. We just have to learn to listen to him and to trust him. We often feel unworthy and unprepared for something he would have us do, but that is when god will use us out of our obedience and he will shine through. Don't let the enemy get ahold of you and tell you that you aren't worthy to do what it is god has called you to do. Is Satan whispering in your ear? Have you told him your not listening to him anymore? He only wants to destroy you and what god has planned for your life. He wants to keep you in that place of confusion, chaos, loneliness, and pain. He wants to keep reminding you of the things you have done in the past. He is constantly at our ears nagging at us to listen to him. Ask God to deafen your ears to what he keeps whispering and let god whisper in your ear how much he loves you. He has a plan for your life and if you trust him he will show you the what it is he would have you do. Not all of us are called to be minsters or pastors, but he has called us all for a purpose. No one has a greater purpose in life than another. We are all part of the body of Christ and it takes each part of the body to work together even down to the smallest of things for it to function. Don't ever feel like that you are insignificant in what you are doing for the god. He has put you in the role because no one else can do what you can do. He has placed something in you that no one else has. You will be able to touch peoples lives that no one else can touch. So don't let Satan keep whispering in your ear the negative thoughts, the hurt of the past, all of the hidden sins, or whatever it is he is using to keep you from what god has called you to do. He has no power over you and you just need to tell him your not listening to him anymore.

Amazing Gift Inside

I wanted to take a few minutes and brag on my daughter Natalie. God has placed a talent inside her that when she ministers it captivates people. You would think she has been miming for a long time, but the truth is she has only done it for a lil over a year now. She new nothing of miming until she started it at another church we attended. She loves god with all her heart and she definitely keeps me on my toes...lol! God is doing some amazing things in her and with the gift he has placed in her. Her is her most recent mime that she has done and I want to warn you....you will laugh uncontrollably. The anointing to minister in mime is definitely there and I just want to say how proud I am of her. I hope that you all enjoy.

What Does The Name Jesus Mean In Your Life?

I read this on someones facebook post and loved and thought I would put it on my blog. Not sure if it is something that he read somewhere or if he wrote it, but either way I liked it.

What Does The Name Jesus Mean In Your Life?

Little children call Him "Father"
President call Him "The great counselor"
The professors call Him "The Wisdom of God"
The Astrologers call Him "The Bright Morning Star"
Zoologist call Him"The lion of the tribe of Judah"
In fore story He is Known as "The tree of Life"
Oceanographers call him "Rivers of the living water"
Geologist call Him "The rock of ages"
Publishers call Him "The Author of our faith"
Sailors call Him The captain of salvation"
Prisoners call Him "The great deliverer"
Carpenter says He is "Door"
Journalist says He is the "Truth"
Even the sinners call Him "The Friend of sinners"
Surveyors call Him "The plan of God"
Doctors call Him "The great healer"
Drivers say He is "The way"
Caterer call Him "The Bread of life"
Teachers call Him "The master"
Theologists call Him "The Baptiser"
Lawyers call Him "The great mediator inter-continental advocate of the whole world"
Soldiers know Him as "Prince of Peace"
Civil engineers call Him "The chief corner stone"
Photographers call Him "The Image of God"
Electrical engineers call Him "The light of the world,even in death He is known as the resurrection"
He is the same Yesterday, Today and Forever.

Our Mission Field

I was sitting in my car waiting to go into work this morning and all I could do is sit there and think about how blessed I was to get to come to work. God has blessed me with this job and has provided for me. We tend to complain about having to come into work and fail to see that God has placed us there for a reason. Sure it is to help provide for our families, but its also a mission field as well. You spend more time with the people you work with than you do with anyone else. How we conduct ourselves on a daily basis is how they see christians. If we are always complaining and having a bad attitude what is that saying to them about being a christian. Sure we all have bad days, but are we showing the people we work around the love, grace, and mercy that God has shown us? I have my moments where I want to tear my hair out at work and want to utter some words that arent very christian like, but I choose to renew my mind and ask him to give me the words I am to speak not my own. So how is it that you are conducting yourself on the mission field?

Are You Acting On Your Emotions?

You should never act on your emotions and leave a foothold for the devil to try and come in and reek havoc. We are human an our emotions are what we go by instinctively. God wants us to seek him and rely on him and not our emotions. Its easy to get caught up in the moment of an emotional situation. We always want to tell someone off or get upset about something instead of taking a step back and say ok god what is it you would have me to do or say. Sometimes the situation that arises you may very good cause to become angry or upset about something, but that doesn't mean that you should act upon it. We all struggle with that as humans and always will. I encourage you to always go to god in prayer seeking what it is he would have you do. When we learn to do that then god can show us the direction we need to go and give us the words he would have us to say. There are many times that god would have us to say nothing and just pray and give it to him. Thank you god for your direction even when we are not sure what to do.

See Them Thru His Eyes

We just had our Missions Conference at church this past saturday evening. Natalie and I did a dance/drama to the song "Give Me Your Eyes". That song has made me think how invisible hurting and broken people are to us as christians everyday. We get so caught up in what is going on in our lives that we forget to see people thru God's eyes. Its not that they are totally invisble to us its just that we dont see them thru his eyes. In order to see people thru his eyes we have to surrender all of our pre conceived ideas of what we have of people when they are messed up on drugs, prostituting out on the streets, an alcoholic, homeless and eating out of trash cans to survive, or whatever it is these people are going thru. It doesnt matter if its going on here or in another country we need to see people thru God's eyes. Love them with unconditional love and pray for them and help them in whatever way we can. We cant just say oh they will just take the money and buy drugs, alcohol, blow it on something else. That is not for us to judge them on nor should we be concerned with. We are to give to them as unselfishly as the father did to us by giving us his son to die for us. Can we do no less than to help hurting people that seem unloved and abandoned. Missions isnt always helping people in other countries its also about helping people in our communities. I thank god for the missionaries that go into other countries and poor their sweat, blood, and tears into these people that they meet. They give so freely of themselves lovingly and unselfishly. That is how we should be everyday to everyone we meet. We should show them the love of God in all we do. So dont look at them thru your eyes any more see them thru Gods eyes, because someone took the time to see you thru his eyes too.

Limitations...Why Do We Put Them On God?

Why is it that we put limitations on what we think god can do? Someone asked me how you can u be filled up until u cant get anymore of god, but then want him to keep asking him to fill you. That is what i call drenching and soaking in all of god until its oozing out of me. Our human minds cant understand how god can possibly keep pouring himself into us. Dont put limitations on what god can do. He wants to inhabit every part of our lives. I just want god to have every part of me until I cant possibly understand how he can do more, give me more, fill me more and then just soak in his presence, breath him in, feel him right there with me. I want more of god than I have ever wanted and want to be able to tell others what it is he has done for me. I want them to see it in the way I live my life everyday and make them stop and say what is it about her that she has this joy and light about her even when things arent going well in my life. More of god is what we should all want and seek everyday. So dont put a limitation on how he can possibly fill you up more when you cant possibly be filled anymore. Its all in our limited human understanding of what we think god can do.
'

I Want The Fire To Consume Every Part of Me

This song has gotten down in my spirit and has never left. God wont relent (give up) until he has every part of you. He wants to take all of the yuck that is inside of you that has been holding you back for so long. We have scars from our past hurts that have built up a wall around our heart. It sounds funny to say, but we are more comfortable with the pain that the scars have left behind than we are to open up our hearts to god so that he can tear down and take out what isn't supposed to be there. We would rather deal with the scars because we can hide behind them and not have to feel anything anymore and we don't have to give all to god. We hold back on purpose because of fear. Fear of serving god and what he will ask of us. Nothing should ever hold you back from god wanting every part of you. We want every part of god but we aren't willing to give him every part of ourselves. He wants to replace all the mess that we have inside us with his heart so that you and he can become one. I want all that god has for me until I possibly cant take it anymore and then I want him to give me more. I don't ever want him to stop pouring himself into me. Its like this song says "...come be the fire inside of me...come be the flame within my heart..." That's exactly how I feel. I want the fire of god to burn in me so bright that you can see nothing but him and not me. I want the fire to consume every part of me. That is my prayer for everyone and myself.

A Mustard Seed Is All We Need

Faith is something that we all say we have in god and what it is he wants for us, but do we really? It is our human nature not to have faith in things that are not tangible. Its easy to say you have faith, but do you really have it when god said all you needed was the faith the size of a mustard seed. Do you know how tiny a mustard seed is and that's all the measure of faith he is saying that we have to have. It seems simple enough to say, but in reality people don't have faith in things that they cannot see for themselves. Seeing isn't faith, faith is seeing. You have to catch hold of it and say god I believe it with everything I have in me and don't let go of it. That little mustard seed of faith seems so unattainable when we are going through some circumstances that we don't how god is going to work it out. God may not work things out the way you think he should, but if you put your trust and faith in him he will do what is best for you. God has a plan for your life and all we have to do is have faith that he will show us what it is and help us to carry out what it is he would have us to do.

Eventful, Amazing, Exhausting Week!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has been an eventful, amazing, and exhausting week. I was promoted to Lead Warehouse Supervisor at my work this week. It was quite a surprise to me that they would want me to fill the position and humbled by all of the kind words that have been said about me. I am like my mother I go in and do my job to the best of my ability and try to make things easier for myself as well as the people whom I work with. I believe you have to have a good work ethic to be able to succeed at your job as well as keeping god first in your life. God has done some amazing things by opening doors that I never asked to be open, but because of my faithfulness in doing what he asks of me he has open the door and poured out a blessing that cannot be measured or contained. I will try to do my best with the responsibilities that have been given to me and strive to make things easier for everyone I work with. I am the type of person who usually fades into the background and does whatever needs to be done, but god has not let me fade away he has put me in the forefront and is using me as he sees fit even when I may not feel worthy to do it. I encourage you all to keep god first in all that you do. When you keep him first he will guide you to where you need to be and will provide all that you need to carry it out even when we think we may not have the ability or feel worthy enough to do so. Please keep me in prayer as I step into this new position at work. I enjoy the company I work for and hope that I do not disappoint them.

Why Did God Have Me Revisit My Past?

Have you ever just had god take you back through your past to remember some things. Not to condemn you but to teach you and show you maybe the right way to do something the next time or it maybe that you will have an opportunity to share with someone that is going through what you had already been through. Our past is not something that we want to dwell on, but it is apart of who you are and you have to be able to pull from your past experiences to learn from them and to be able to let god use you. There are many things that alot of us would like to keep buried in the past to never surface again, but I know myself that god has used me many times to minister or share with someone that is going through the very same thing that I went through. Even if I didn't handle it in the best way when I went through it but god gave me the wisdom to know what to do next time. I believe that everything that we go through good and bad is for a reason. It is not always for us, sometimes it for someone else that you may have to minister to later on down the road. Just like I said in my last entry we are called into the ministry by the way we live our lives for god. If people can see what you came out of and where you are now that is such a testimony to how god can change a persons life. It also shows the grace, love, and forgiveness he has given to us. My past is not something I like to revisit very often, but god has healed me of that past hurt that I went through so that I may pull from it when he needs me to. Just remember when god has you revisit the past don't be closed minded about it let god use you and help you to show others what he has done in your life and what he will do for them.

But I Wasnt Called To Be In Ministry....Are You Sure About That?

I have heard many people say that they were not called to be in ministry or to be a preacher. I have to disagree with them. Everyone of us is called into ministry just not in the same way. Did not Jesus tell the disciples to go and preach the gospel to the world. We are disciples of Jesus and each and everyday that god gives us here on this earth is a day that we are called to be in ministry by the way we live our lives. There are people that you can reach that maybe a pastor or minster cannot because you see these people on a daily basis. Those people watch you everyday and how you conduct yourself and listen to the words you speak from your mouth. That is the example of a christian that these people see and if you are not living the way you should then they ask themselves why would I want to be a christian if I see them living like that. Even non-believers know that there are things that Christians should and shouldn't be saying and doing. So you are in ministry each and everyday just as a pastor or minister would be just in a different way. You don't ever want to be a hindrance to someone and cause them to stumble because of the way you live your life or by some of the things that you say. Many times that is the only picture that these people see of what a christian is. We should strive everyday to let people see Jesus in us and how he works through us. If you are not praying and seeking god and keeping yourself grounded in the word then it will show because you will be bearing no fruit and you will be as barren as a desert. Each day that I go into work I have opportunity to minister to my coworkers by the way I conduct myself, the words that are coming from my mouth, and the way I treat them. If I was to go in there and be cursing, gossiping about people, or even having a bad attitude then how are they supposed to see the Jesus in me and how am I supposed to be able to minister to them. I don't mean you have to be a bible beater and hit them over the head I mean you minister to people by example and the way they see you live your life. You never know the impact that you will have on someones life just by showing them the love of god and treating them with kindness, love, and respect. So don't ever think that god didn't call you to minister because we are all called to be ministers just not in the conventional way that you may think. God has us doing things his way not the way we may always think.

Be The Example Not The Hinderance

I have had a very stressful last two weeks with work. Sometimes you wonder how you are going to get through all the stress and just be able to do your job effectively. This was my prayer for one of the days that I had and that day I felt god settle in the warehouse and no matter what happened that day I felt peace.


My Prayer For The Day January 29, 2010

God you know the week I have been having and you know the circumstances behind all of it. Please help me not to become frustrated, lose my patience, let words come out of my mouth that shouldn't. Instead god let your presence settle in this place so they when we take a breathe we can smell your sweet presence. Let us soak it in and have the peace and joy of having you near to us. I pray that you touch each of my co-workers and that they come to know you as i know you. Let our thoughts be your thoughts today. Let us not worry about petty things that don't matter but to keep our eyes focused on you. I want my desires to be your desires. Change our hearts and our minds today so that we can show others of the perfect love you have given us. Thank you god for resting in this place today.


We sometimes need to change our attitude and our way of doing things. We are the ones who change the atmosphere around us. When we give that control up to the enemy or to people around us then the peace, joy, and love of god takes a back seat to the chaos around us. I had to stop that day at work and pray for my co-workers and pray that god change my mindset and my attitude that day. How can I expect god to do something in my co-workers lives when I don't change my way of thinking and doing things. As Christians the world watches us and we should be the example not the hindrance.

The Three Trees

A friend of mine sent this to me and I loved it and thought I would share it on my blog. It was something I think that we as christians need to keep in mind.

THE 3 TREES

Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods.
They were discussing their hopes and dreams when the first tree said,


"Someday I hope to be a treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver
and precious gems. I could be decorated with intricate carving and everyone
would see the beauty."




Then the second tree said, "Someday I will be a mighty ship. I will take
kings and queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world.
Everyone will feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull."

Finally the third tree said, "I want to grow to be the tallest and
straightest tree in the forest. People will see me on top of the Hill and
look up to my branches, and think of the heavens and God and how close to
them I am reaching. I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will
always remember me."

After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true, a group of
woodsmen came upon the trees.
When one came to the first tree he said, "This looks like a strong tree, I
think I should be able to sell the wood to a carpenter," and he began
cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he knew that the carpenter
would make him into a treasure chest.

At the second tree the woodsman said, "This looks like a strong tree. I
should be able to sell it to the shipyard." The second tree was happy
because he knew he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.

When the
woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened because he knew
that if they cut him down his dreams would not come true. One of the
Woodsmen said, "I don't need anything special from my Tree, I'll take this
one," and he cut it down.

When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was made into a feed box
for animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This was not
at all what he had prayed for.

The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of
being a mighty ship and carrying kings had come to an end.

The third tree was cut into large pieces, and left alone in the dark.

The years went by, and the trees forgot about their dreams.

Then one day, a man and woman came to the barn.. She gave birth and they
placed the baby in the hay in the feed box that was made from the first
tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this
manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event
and knew that it had held the greatest treasure of all time.

Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second
tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were out on the
water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to
keep the men safe. The men woke the sleeping man, and He stood and said
"Peace" and the Storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that it had
carried the King of Kings in its boat.

Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the
streets as the people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they came to
a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the
top of a hill. When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong
enough to stand at the top of the hill and be as close to God as was
possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it.



The moral of this story is that when things don't seem to be going your way,
always know that God has a plan for you. If you place your trust in Him, God
will give you great gifts.

Each of the trees got what they wanted, just not in the way they had
Imagined.

We don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just know that His ways
are not our ways, but His ways are always best..

Drench Me

Some wonderful things are already happening during this fast. I pray that many more prayers are answered and that we let his desires become our desires. That our mindset be changed to focus on him and what he has for us to do. Many times we pray for our own desires and we never think to ask what his desire for us is. Sunday at the end of service the song "Rain Dance" was played and we did flags and a billow to it. That song has stuck with me since then. I just want god to drench me in his presence and speak to me what his will is for me. I have my own desires that I would like to see come to pass, but I want what his will is for me first and foremost. This time of fasting for me is for me to get myself ready for this new journey he has me on. The unknown can be difficult because we always want to know whats going to happen, but if we knew what was going to happen then we might change the course that god has us set on. I cant help but to sit here and think of that song "The More I Seek You" while I'm writing this and all I can think about is god drench me. I want to soak in his presence and lay at his feet and rest in him. Listening to the words of that song....."I want to sit at your feet... drink from the cup in your hand....lay back against you and breathe...feel your heartbeat...this love is so deep...its more than I can stand ....I melt in your peace....its overwhelming..."

I Dont Want To Eat My Blessing

Last nite Pastor Josh was talking about fasting and praying. Something that Beth said last nite rang deep in my spirit. She said "I don't want to eat my blessing". Its very true that when are fasting that we have all kinds of thoughts running through our minds that we cant make it through the fast. Sometimes you have to push through the pain in order to receive the blessing. I know myself in the past when I was on a fast it was very difficult because I would tell myself that I couldn't possibly do it. I always would find an excuse to either stop or to alter it somehow. I had to learn to push myself through the hunger pains, the headaches, and the thoughts that would come to my mind that I couldn't possibly make it. Many times we don't always see a result right away from when we fasted and prayed for something and we get discouraged. Sometimes god has other things to show us and he will often change our mindset through it all. Be specific in what you are praying for and be open to what god is trying to say to you and show you. Pastor Josh also made a good point in saying that wouldn't it be awesome if we fasted and prayed for others needs just like we do our own needs. Could you imagine the breakthroughs that would take place in peoples lives if everyone would do that. I know myself I am praying for some specific things during this fast. I want god to bless me financially so that I may be able to purchase a house. That is something I have wanted for a longtime, but I have to say that god had to show me how to be a good steward of what I had and be happy with where I was at before he allows me to step into owning a house. I pray for more wisdom so that I don't make the same mistakes as I have in the past. I am praying for the one god has for me to spend my life with whomever he maybe. I know god is preparing him as he is preparing me for the journey we will have together. I am also praying for my children and for god to keep them safe and guide them through the many decisions they will have to face. There are many other things I am praying for, but that is a few of them. Take this time of fasting and praying and put everything aside and focus on him. That is probly the one thing that I am praying for the most is for him to help me keep my focus on him and to always put him first in all that I do.

LISTEN........THINK........LOOK!!!!

Think about what you're thinking about, Look at what you looking at, Listen to what it is you're listening to. Those words have spoken to me so deeply since Wednesday nite. They are very simple words that are said but have such a profound meaning to them. We are so busy we don't take the time to stop and ponder that. Look at what it is your looking at. We find ourselves looking at things that don't matter sometimes and we have to regain our focus on god. We are so easily distracted by things that we need our vision refocused on him. Don't let your eyes wander from here to there but stay focused on him. Don't get your eyes on man but on god. Let him put the blinders like a horse has to help you stay on the right track. He will lead you where it is that you are to be. We seem to focus on the circumstances that are in front of our face instead of looking passed them and keeping our eyes on the destination ahead. Think about what it is your thinking about. The mind is a battlefield of thoughts that are going all over the place sometimes. We need to pray that our minds be renewed and think thoughts of him and what is he would have us to do. So many times the thoughts in our minds are what comes out of our mouths and our mouths are the powerful tool that god has given us. It shows whats in our hearts and minds. If your filling yourself with things that are not of god then people see the fruit of what we are by what we speak and what we speak is what we think. So what is it your thinking is it the thoughts of god or our own thoughts of confusion. Listen to what it is your listening to. Are you listening to the voice of god and hearing what it is he is speaking to you? We have all kinds of opinions and voices around us all the time that speak all kinds of things that sound good sometimes, but its not the voice of god. We think because someone has good intentions and the words sound good it must be from god. We need to be on our faces seeking his voice to speak to us not taking for granted that what someone speaks out of their mouths that its from god. We need to be in his word letting him speak to us thru his words not mans words. We need to be still and say god I'm listening speak to me. I want to hear what it is he has for me not what someone says he has for me. So take a few moments and ponder those three things. LISTEN TO WHAT IT IS YOUR LISTENING TO, THINK ABOUT WHAT YOUR THINKING ABOUT, LOOK AT WHAT YOU LOOKING AT.